Candles
The world is currently on fire. One thing that can make us feel safe and comforted in uncertain times are these wax beacons of aromatherapy. Settle in. Grab a weighted blanket. And throw out your Yankee Candles because, honey, that’s the OPPOSITE of self-care.
1. Rain by Field Apothecary, £35
These candles are from IRELAND, therefore they are already adorable. Also, doesn’t it feel chic to use the euro instead of a plain old dollar? They have a burn time of 40 hours and smell like warm air rising from the Cliffs of Moher. Treat yourself to a trip abroad without ever leaving the comfort of your living room. Smell: patchouli, geranium, lemon and vetiver.
2. Slow Burn by Boy Smells, $39
These have been sold out sine I was in utero, but it’s worth joining the wait list to experience this Kacey Musgraves/Boy Smells collab treasure. Take a break the stressors of everyday life (and the dumpster fire that is 2020) to stop and smell the candles. Also, if you haven’t listened to Golden Hour yet, then… are you okay? Smell: incense, black pepper, elemi, guaiac, raspberry, tonka, amber and smoked papyrus.
3. Tomb of the Eagles by D.S. and Durga, $65
This candle is named after a REAL PLACE on a farm in Scotland where eagle talons where buried with human remains to “fly their souls to heaven”. Also one of the base notes is BONES. If that isn’t witchy, I don’t know what is. She’s a little pricier than the others, but that’s because YOU’RE WORTH IT. Even self isolating at home, this candle will transport you into an open field near a lake house filled with all of your favorite people. The candle also comes with a CELTIC PLAYLIST to further thrill your sense and leave you talking in a Scottish accent to the Amazon delivery driver. Smell: clover, sea, grass, moss and bones.
4. Baies by Diptyque, $68
Another crazy expense to shell out $68 for a 7 oz. candle, but… can you really put a price on elegance? Yes. Yes you can. However, this is the one to splurge on. The burn time is 60 HOURS a.k.a how many hours a week I spend watching Survivor. Plus, Diptyque only uses all natural, pure ingredients, which is definitely a reason to reach deep into that pocketbook. The candle will send you into a maze of blackberry bushes, but instead of crushing anxiety or claustrophobia, you’ll feel like a May Queen. Smell: berries, black currant and roses.
5. Oscar Wilde by Paddywax’s Library Series, $12
The Library Series offers many scents dedicated to literary greats, but none tickle my fancy as much as the Oscar Wilde. Not only is it the mot affordable candle on this list, but it’s musk scent offers the romance and tranquility of being alone in a library with every book in the world at your fingertips. The possibilities! The candle also includes a quote from Mr. Wilde himself to pay homage to his masterpieces. Appeal to your inner bookworm and let your senses soar. Smell: bergamot, mandarin, lemon leaf, lime and peppermint.
Moisturizers
Every winter it happens. Like clockwork, I’ll look down at my knees, elbows, hands, even my face, and think, “Wow…honey, your skin is DRY.” It’s dryer than the Sahara. It’s dryer than my vagina after a guy starts talking about Joe Rogan. It’s so dry that I, a white girl, have taken to calling my skin ashy. Nobody wants that! It doesn’t help that I’m alabaster pale and my skin flakes look like freshly fallen March snow. (What? It snows in March in the Midwest.) When I was a teen, I took to rubbing Aquaphor all over my entire face, which would result in breakouts, which called for acne spot treatments, which would dry out my skin, thus repeating the vicious cycle. Luckily, things have changed. When your inner circle consists of a freelance beauty writer, esthetician in training and clinical skin care line employee, you get a lot of recommendations (and sometimes free samples!) Today, i’m going to share with you the wee nuggets of knowledge I’ve garnered through many, many, MANY trials and errors.
1. First Aid Beauty Ultra Repair Face Moisturizer, $27
This moisturizer is the reasonably priced definition of a chef’s kiss. My skin was in dangerous territory this winter. Remember that horrifying cycle I mentioned above, when your skin is perpetually oscillating between dryness and cystic acne? You can lock yourself in the bathroom with Dr. Pimple Popper on auto-play, or you can buy this heaven-sent face cream. The water-based moisturizer is lightweight, quick-absorbing and leaves your skin with a Velveteen Rabbit finish. It consists of Meadowfoam Seed Oil (chic), Shea Butter (yum) and Avocado Oil (fatty in all the right ways). The product also boats alcohol-free, gluten-free, nut-free and vegan ingredients. Meaning, if you have skin so sensitive that the wrong look causes you to break out in hives, you’re covered!
*****5 out of 5 Diptique candles
2. Hada Labo Rohto Hadalabo Gokujun Hyaluronic Lotion, $17
If the peak in Korean skincare routines has taught us anything, it’s that white women will do ANYTHING to their skin that an Asian woman tells them to. Myself included. Because of Hada Labo’s ability to hold twice as much water as conventional Hyaluronic Acid products, this moisturizer has successfully replaced my need for primer. I just slather on a drop or two (trust me, a little goes a long way) before applying foundation and voila! No more cracks. No more flakes. A completely smooth finish. And because it only takes a bit of product to get the job done, one bottle has lasted me last OVER A YEAR. For 17 bucks? Yeah, I’ll take it. Be warned: This one takes a while to ship because it’s coming from Japan, but it’s worth the wait. Plus, you can break out your DuoLingo because the ingredients are in Japanese. (Don’t worry, all you need to know is that it’s free of fragrances, mineral oil and alcohol). What else could a gal ask for?
****4 out of 5 Jennifer Anistons walking away from Brad Pitt
3. Biossance Squalane + Omega Repair Cream, $58
This one is for my fellow queens in their late twenties and above. We can refuse to smile for the rest of our lives to combat smile lines, or we can just use this sustainable, cruelty-free cream with biotechnology (yay science!). This moisturizer is part of a Biossance 100% plant-based squalane skincare line. Squalane is the shelf version of squalene, a natural hydrator our sebaceous glands make. God, the human body is gross. This moisturizer comes with all the good fats your skin needs without leaving a greasy film. Say GUHBYE to fine lines, wrinkles and dryness and say WHADDUP, BITCH? to firmness and elasticity. Also, buying this as opposed to a non-sustainable moisturizer means you’re doing your part in making a difference for the planet. Take that, friend from college who keeps Instagram storying herself doing Habitat for Humanity!
***3 out of 5 Sairose Ronan Little Women monologues
4. Drunk Elephant Protini Polypeptide Moisturizer, $68
Rich, rich, anyone rich? Spending upwards of $60 on moisturizer should be illegal, but when you think of your skin in the grand scheme of things, it’s like a newborn baby with stock bonds, and you need to invest in it’s future. The Protini leaves your skin looking younger and revived while reducing the appearance of lines, wrinkles, and sun damage. It’s basically like shooting whey protein directly into your skin cells without having to set foot in a Beyond Juice. Plus, it’s formulated at an ideal pH level of 4.0, which means your skin will be anything but basic. Grateful for the opportunity to break out my pH level material for this! Feel free to pat yourself on the back because Drunk Elephant is another cruelty-free brand and a supporter of IEF (International Elephant Foundation).
*****5 out of 5 baby elephants playing
5. Tatcha The Water Cream, $68
Okay, this one’s also gonna potentially break the bank, but it’s worth the week of ramen to compensate! Not only is it cruelty-free, but it will also have you looking like a poreless Barbie Doll. The oil-free, anti-aging water cream releases a burst of skin-improving JAPANESE nutrients (hello, jet setter), powerful botanicals (Pomona Sprout who?) and optimal hydration (Say goodbye to being a thirsty bitch). With a touch of 23-karat gold, you can reason away the expense, because you can’t put a price on love!
*****4 out of 5 women refusing to smile after a man asks them to
6. Milk Makeup Vegan Milk Moisturizer, $38
I’m a big fan of Milk products. Their SPF foundation saved me when I found myself in L.A. and thoroughly unprepared for direct sunlight in November. Their Vegan Milk Moisturizer contains Desert Milk™ (their trademark name for extracts from desert plants), Fig Milk, Shea Butter, Oat Milk (to restore and soothe dry skin) and Argan Milk, Grapeseed Oil and, of course, Squalane (to keep that moisture locked away like a Love is Blind contestant locks away their frontal lobe!). The non-greasy, milky moisturizer absorbs quick and immediately so your skin will feel as soft as a baby’s tush.
***3 out of 5 friends cancelling plans with you at the last minute
7. Peter Thomas Roth Water Drench Hyaluronic Cloud Cream, $52
Just the name sounds softer than an angel asleep on a goose feather pillow… and it doesn’t disappoint! This concentrated cream contains 30 percent hyaluronic acid (which transforms atmospheric vapor into the hydration your skin craves). For up to 72 hours, the ProHyal+® will improve hydration and the antioxidant-rich elderberry will combat aging. So, be prepared to look like Emily Ratajkowski for the next 3 days.
*****5 out of 5 old gift cards you found that haven’t expired yet
8. The Ordinary Natural Moisturizing Factors +HA, $6
This one’s for our thrifty thots. Are you someone with a Roth IRA or any kind of 5 year plan? Sounds like you know how to manage your money. Please teach me. But just because you’re a budgeting babe doesn’t mean you have to be punished with fine lines and dry patches. This moisturizer offers non-greasy hydration at an affordable price! It’s got amino acids, phospholipids, alpha/beta/gamma fatty acids, triglycerides, sterols and sterol esters, glycerin, ceramide precursors, urea, saccharides, sodium PCA, and hyaluronic acid. If you know what any of that means, congratulations you’re in MENSA. If not, basically all you need to know is it’ll provide immediate hydration with lasting results.
***3 out of 5 pizzas after completing a round of Whole 30
9. Peter Thomas Roth Vital-E Microbiome Age Defense Cream, $75
This moisturizer is the latest in Peter Thomas Roth’s skincare line. It JUST got released and we were given the exclusive 411. Depending on your daily routines, you’re likely in frequent contact with technology, pollution and, unfortunately, climate change. The age defense cream uses 3% Butterfly Ginger Root Extract to detoxify skin exposed to blue light from our phones and computers. The Gamma E Antioxidant Technology repairs and strengthens skin in order to support your natural microbiome, which can be damaged by your surroundings. TLDR, this moisturizer should come with a lab coat because just using it makes you a scientist worthy of an up and running Dexter’s Laboratory. Once applied, the cream acts as an invisible shield to defend against aging and environmental aggressors (Still susceptible to Corona Virus… Sorry).
****4 out of 5 unexpected puppy encounters on the street
10. Josie Maran Argan Daily Moisturizer SPF 47, $34
Josie Maran Daily Moisturizer is amazing. As an extremely pale girl who looks like she’s been trapped in a bunker for decades, I know the importance of SPF. It’s the reason people who first meet ask if I’m a college student as opposed to wondering if I’m collecting social security. SPF 47 is impressive (and rare) for a moisturizer and it allows you to skip the sunscreen. As a busy girl on the go, you don’t have time for a whole morning skincare routine, so why not combine a few steps? It’s basically a 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner but for skin!
*****5 out of 5 Pink performing “Glitter in the Air” at the Grammys